Zen and the art of life decluttering

Inventory is the road to organization and happiness. Sounds like a crazy idea, right? That’s what I thought when I first read about the concept. Could it be physically possible to inventory every single thing that I am in possession of. And is that weren’t nuts enough, but this was somehow going to help me declutter and organize my life? There’s no way this is going to work.

The more I sat in my somewhat unorganized room and reflected on my mother’s famous mantra — “a messy desk is a messy mind” — I began to think that there could be some truth to this. Honestly, there are things in my possession that I didn’t even know I owned or still existed. And if I haven’t wondered about them in this long, do I really still need it? Conversely, there are things that I lend out to people and when I need them, I don’t have them. An inventory would show me exactly how much stuff I have. Every single item in my closet would have to be subjected to a)keep b)sell c)donate d)trash. And everything except for trash and donate needs to be documented. Like get all nerdy with your Excel skills and make a spreadsheet of every single item. Complete with prices paid if you can remember. That’s where I started to lose it. Does this person know how much stuff I have? Obviously not. Seriously guys, stuff with the price tags still on.

But as I kept reading this crazy nonsensical guide to organization, it hits me that they’re right. Making a list of everything you own is not just a tedious torture task. It’s a way to see how much your worth — and decide how much you can gain from yourself. On top of that. its meant to shock the pants off you so you see how disposable you are treating your income. (Does that make sense?)

I contemplated this while remembering a scene from Sex and the City*:

Carrie has just broken up with Aidan (why I will never understand. John Corbett is god, but I digress) and she needs money for a down payment to buy her apartment back from him. As she tries on shoes with Miranda, she wonders where all her money has gone.

Miranda: How many pairs of those do you think you have? 50?

Carrie: Come on?

Miranda: 100?

Carrie: Yeah, OK.

Miranda: At $400 dollars a pop, that’s your down payment.

Carrie: That’s only $4000. So?

Miranda: No that’s not, that’s $40,000.

Carrie: What?!!? Seriously. Oh. My. God. I am literally going to be the old woman who lived in her shoe.

So in an attempt to only be Crazy Cat Lady, I am going to try this theory out. We’ll see if this wacky new age organizational guru is right and I will be on the road to wealth and happiness and zen in no time. Plus, what else better am I doing with my time?!

*I love pop culture. This will be one of many references. Get used to it.

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